[This surprises her and also hits straight to her heart, and with good reason. She completely understood why her son would have been resentful; she had been prepared to make up for it, and for the possibility of never being accepted by her own family again.
She's smiling now, and reaching out to stroke Josh's cheek.]
Thank you. You didn't have to, but... thank you. I'm just glad to have you, Cindy, and your father back in my life.
[ And his head tilts into that touch, because those years are years he can't take back. ] We're glad to have you back too, Mom.
[ He sets the flowers aside and comes in for a hug.
Getting woken up at what the hell o'clock in the morning to see you in the kitchen was a treat. And he's realizing that he really should spend the day home -- you'll likely be heading back stateside tomorrow, after all. ]
[She hugs her son right back, and even lets her fingers drift through his hair just the way that she used to. It's almost heartbreakingly wonderful, how she can do this again.]
I'm so proud of you, Josh. Makes me think that, in spite of everything, maybe I didn't screw up so badly.
[ His embrace tightens at that. When he speaks again, it's really, really soft. ]
You didn't screw up.
[ Pulling back a little now, looking at her head-on. ]
I know, Mom. [ About Project Bladerunner. About the dual life she'd had to lead. About how she'd had to leave to keep them all safe. ] Alistair Mordechai let me see the dossier he'd compiled on you.
[ Here's a smile of okay and him leaning down to brush a kiss over your cheek before he's moseying over to grab you both some food and retreat to where you've sent him.
After a moment though, ] I couldn't read through it for very long. [ His voice is soft. ] You were so young.
And you wanted your own life outside of everything TFV had. I didn't know how to feel, to realize that I'd been so angry -- and for all the wrong reasons.
[ He takes a moment. ] I just knew that I had to get you back. For all of us.
I'm glad it ended with you back here. [ His eyes are a little moist as he says that, his voice a little tremulous as he lifts a hand to your face.
He'd always been such a tactile child, and that was because of you and his father, of the way that this family was just built. ]
I know I've said it. But I missed you, so much.
[ His thoughts are also turning to what you told him, about Hikaru. About how he'd nearly lost you if it weren't for the man who now holds his heart the way Dad holds yours.
You know him well. Even with all the years lost, you'll probably see the way his gaze drops and turns away, his thoughts wandering just a little from the conversation down to the rings he'd been given as a gift. ]
[ Thinking about how he was looking forward to landing a kiss right on his boyfriend's mouth because there's no thing for thank yous on today's holiday but good things, yeah? ]
I have a date.
[ The end of that sentence might sound like a question but it's really not. ]
I wanted to do something nice for um... him. Today.
I want to be more than just good. I want to be better. [ Pressing his lips together again. It's so easy to open up to you, to just say things and admit that he feels a little over his head and that he wants to try anyway.
Have a soft, nervous laugh at that as he pulls one hand away to run fingers through his hair. ]
I haven't been too good a boyfriend to him. I've been nervous and I worry and I overthink and -- anyway. [ Yes, he is babbling, he swears there is a point to this. ] So, we were at Ireland, right? I went a little bit ahead of the Hounds, [ thank you, Alistair Mordechai ] and I drive all the way to see him and it rains just as I lock the car.
And then I'm standing in thw doorway looking at him looking at me and I just... [ Your boy looks helpless, Angela. Helplessly in love and happy. ]
I hope... you're... um. I hope you're okay with uh, him. [ You both seemed fine earlier? But you probably know what he really means. ]
[She listens to him quietly, because she knows that a part of him probably needs to talk this out. Hell, the fact that he's talking about it in the first place is testament to how much his relationship with Hikaru Shinta means to him.
That last comment makes her blink, though.]
I've only got one problem with him.
[Saying that with so much gravity, it might be worrisome.]
[ Yeah, this one's going all deer in headlights because you're his mother and he's kind of ready to do whatever it takes to be with That One for a long, long time. ]
He is amazingly, painfully shy for a high-profile Keeper of the Vigil, and the man who kinda sorta saved my life. He's way too good at making sure that we never get caught alone together.
[ He loves you, Hikaru, and this is why he is going to do this. ]
His family's great. And I think you've met... Tohru Fukuzawa?
[ He hasn't been... keeping up with Hecaton with the same amount of focus as he had before. You're okay, Lincoln Hawke is in charge, and they're on shore leave anyway, so. ]
I dunno, I was thinking that maybe... we could... [ he's just going to smile at you because you probably know where this is going, Mom. ]
[ Aaaand he's reaching out for your hand again. He gets it, he really does, but you're here and you're his mom and he's going to miss you when you go. ]
Well, we'll always have text. And Vicetime.
[ Yeah, Makoto's got the city and there are other Sin-Eater's on call. And what good is taking shore leave if he can't sit the fuck down and enjoy the fact that he has you for the rest of today. ]
I'm going to need to leave around six [ for his date, eheh... ] but point me where you need me here so I can make like a good boy and be useful to you?
[ He's honestly already thinking of wrestling kitchen rights from you. He's not the only one who's missed you. ]
[ He's rising from his seat at that, and sneaking a quick eskimo kiss your way justbecause he can ( he has you back, he will repeat that as many times as necessary because it is something he didn't think would come true ) before he's picking up those cigarettes and that ashtray and that bottle of his. ]
I can go call Cindy.
[ It's an offer that means J can focus on her network and you can maybe mosey on over to Dad in the back.
Which makes him wonder: ] Mom? What kind of a Technomancer are you?
[ He knows, based off of his readings of the other supernatural classes that there are different paths or disciplines depending on what you are. Cindy's fairly young at this, but you've been a Technomancer for a really long time. ]
[ And yes, there is a brief flash of holy shit that is amazing because now that you're back and safe in the ways that count, he can temporarily shelve his feelings on the matter surrounding Valkyrie. ]
Maybe... sometime... can you show me what you can do?
[ Or tell him all about it, whichever works is totally fine by this one. ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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She's smiling now, and reaching out to stroke Josh's cheek.]
Thank you. You didn't have to, but... thank you. I'm just glad to have you, Cindy, and your father back in my life.
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[ He sets the flowers aside and comes in for a hug.
Getting woken up at what the hell o'clock in the morning to see you in the kitchen was a treat. And he's realizing that he really should spend the day home -- you'll likely be heading back stateside tomorrow, after all. ]
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I'm so proud of you, Josh. Makes me think that, in spite of everything, maybe I didn't screw up so badly.
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You didn't screw up.
[ Pulling back a little now, looking at her head-on. ]
I know, Mom. [ About Project Bladerunner. About the dual life she'd had to lead. About how she'd had to leave to keep them all safe. ] Alistair Mordechai let me see the dossier he'd compiled on you.
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Should've figured he'd do that. His reputation was something else with my former superiors. So was the Blade King's.
[Anyway.]
Let's sit out back. Go set things up and bring out some beers? I'll follow once I've found a vase to put these in.
[She's picking up that bouquet you gave her, and smiling down at it.]
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Talk will happen when you're both settled down. ]
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It's nice, you know. Having a home again. Feeling safe.
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He doesn't have words just yet, being around you is enough. ]
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Maybe I should get a hold of that file for myself. It'd be nice to see how Brother Seer managed to dig all of that up.
[She doesn't doubt his capabilities at all. She's just interested in the process.]
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We could ask him. [ There's a thoughtful look on his face at that. ]
I'd... like to see it again.
[ You'll note that when he says that, there is the unspoken I have questions, if you'll be okay to answer them. ]
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Your father gets that same look when he's got something on his mind, or when he wants to figure things out.
[Her unspoken response is simple: Ask away.]
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Totally caught.
After a moment though, ] I couldn't read through it for very long. [ His voice is soft. ] You were so young.
And you wanted your own life outside of everything TFV had. I didn't know how to feel, to realize that I'd been so angry -- and for all the wrong reasons.
[ He takes a moment. ] I just knew that I had to get you back. For all of us.
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[Then, softly:]
I didn't have much of that. Had to make my own way, all the way until the road just... ended.
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He'd always been such a tactile child, and that was because of you and his father, of the way that this family was just built. ]
I know I've said it. But I missed you, so much.
[ His thoughts are also turning to what you told him, about Hikaru. About how he'd nearly lost you if it weren't for the man who now holds his heart the way Dad holds yours.
You know him well. Even with all the years lost, you'll probably see the way his gaze drops and turns away, his thoughts wandering just a little from the conversation down to the rings he'd been given as a gift. ]
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What is it?
[Because she can ask you that now. She has the right to be a good mother.]
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And very much like a teenager. ]
It's... nothing. I was just, um.
[ Thinking about how he was looking forward to landing a kiss right on his boyfriend's mouth because there's no thing for thank yous on today's holiday but good things, yeah? ]
I have a date.
[ The end of that sentence might sound like a question but it's really not. ]
I wanted to do something nice for um... him. Today.
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This is too cute.]
And you're here, wasting the time that could be spending with him now with me? I'm touched.
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This is really nice. This was one of the things he thought he'd never have. ]
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[Grinning, as she's taking a swig from her bottle.]
I reserve the right to rib you at every possible opportunity. It's a Mom Thing.
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[ He is so totally okay with it. ]
I really love him. [ There's a helpless little look sent your way. ] I really, really do. It's a little terrifying sometimes.
[ That admission homes out soft. ]
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It's okay to be scared. Love is scary, just as it is wonderful. It changes you, corny as that might sound.
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I want to be more than just good. I want to be better. [ Pressing his lips together again. It's so easy to open up to you, to just say things and admit that he feels a little over his head and that he wants to try anyway.
Have a soft, nervous laugh at that as he pulls one hand away to run fingers through his hair. ]
I haven't been too good a boyfriend to him. I've been nervous and I worry and I overthink and -- anyway. [ Yes, he is babbling, he swears there is a point to this. ] So, we were at Ireland, right? I went a little bit ahead of the Hounds, [ thank you, Alistair Mordechai ] and I drive all the way to see him and it rains just as I lock the car.
And then I'm standing in thw doorway looking at him looking at me and I just... [ Your boy looks helpless, Angela. Helplessly in love and happy. ]
I hope... you're... um. I hope you're okay with uh, him. [ You both seemed fine earlier? But you probably know what he really means. ]
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That last comment makes her blink, though.]
I've only got one problem with him.
[Saying that with so much gravity, it might be worrisome.]
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...w-what's that?
[ Yeah, this one's going all deer in headlights because you're his mother and he's kind of ready to do whatever it takes to be with That One for a long, long time. ]
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[She wishes to speak to him properly now, okay!]
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It's the shoulders that move first. And then you'll hear him, just as he brings up his hands to scrub them over his face. ]
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Well. Maybe she doesn't have to.]
Swear to me, son, that you'll do something about that. Or you'll let me handle it.
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And then he's going to give you a kiss on the cheek. ]
I promise I will even resort to blackmail to get my boyfriend [ wow, holy shit, it feels good to say that out loud ] to have dinner with us sometime.
[ Actually. Huh. There's an idea. ]
Now that I think about it... [ you'll know that smile, Mom. Your son has an Idea. ]
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What are you thinking?
[She is pretty sure she will like it.]
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His family's great. And I think you've met... Tohru Fukuzawa?
[ He hasn't been... keeping up with Hecaton with the same amount of focus as he had before. You're okay, Lincoln Hawke is in charge, and they're on shore leave anyway, so. ]
I dunno, I was thinking that maybe... we could... [ he's just going to smile at you because you probably know where this is going, Mom. ]
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[There's a dry note to her voice at that point, but it's mostly said that way in jest.]
Sure.
[She's happy to be a mother to you in any way possible.]
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I'm really glad you're home.
When... you'll be heading back stateside tomorrow, huh?
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[Especially since Brigade, his second, has been placed on mandatory shore leave, and Tohru Fukuzawa is still recuperating.]
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Well, we'll always have text. And Vicetime.
[ Yeah, Makoto's got the city and there are other Sin-Eater's on call. And what good is taking shore leave if he can't sit the fuck down and enjoy the fact that he has you for the rest of today. ]
I'm going to need to leave around six [ for his date, eheh... ] but point me where you need me here so I can make like a good boy and be useful to you?
[ He's honestly already thinking of wrestling kitchen rights from you. He's not the only one who's missed you. ]
Why don't we swap.
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[She hasn't... really been able to do that.]
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I can go call Cindy.
[ It's an offer that means J can focus on her network and you can maybe mosey on over to Dad in the back.
Which makes him wonder: ] Mom? What kind of a Technomancer are you?
[ He knows, based off of his readings of the other supernatural classes that there are different paths or disciplines depending on what you are. Cindy's fairly young at this, but you've been a Technomancer for a really long time. ]
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[She was how they managed to write an proper on Technomancer as it is.]
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Maybe... sometime... can you show me what you can do?
[ Or tell him all about it, whichever works is totally fine by this one. ]
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Isn't a mother allowed to keep a few secrets from her son?
[Saying that with a wink.]
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He's chuckling though. ]
Then, I guess I'll need to do a bit more research on my end then.
[ You're getting a kiss on the cheek for that as he's holding the door open for you. ]